Sad days

I'm most grateful that I love being in Uganda.  I'm even more grateful for the technologies that allow me to easily stay in touch with family and friends, as it really helps with homesickness.

Having said that, there are times that just prick my heart and completely undo me.  Today, it's my goddaughter's birthday; my sweet baby is now 17.

My head tells me that I've not been involved in her life for quite a while (due to a number of extenuating circumstances), and that as much as I love her, it's not quite the same.  My heart is grieving that lost time, and remembers the sweet girl who used to call me "AUNT Jessica" (emphasis hers) compared to her siblings' "Ant Jessica," following my southern pronunciation.  

I love that Facebook allowed me to wish her a happy birthday on her wall, and her comment "Aww.  :)  Thank you Aunt Jessica!!! Miss you!" just made me want to hop on a plane, take her out for dinner, and catch up on the years the locusts have stolen (yes, I'm currently reading Joel).

After chapel the dean asked how I was, and I told her that some days it's easier to be away from home than others.  She asked if I needed to go cry, and yes, I do.  If  I think about it too much during this curriculum review, my eyes tear up. 

It's not easy to work on days like this.